The Little Book of Yes

Top 10 lesson learned from book “The Little Book of Yes”:

1. Giving

🤝Giving to others is the first step to getting what you want. Get into the habit of asking, “Who can I help?” rather than “Who can help me.

2. Exchanging

👉Exchanging is the process of giving and receiving between people in such a way that everyone benefits. Look for ways to pay favors forward.

If a colleague appreciates your help, ask if they could pass their help on to someone else in your team or network.

3. Pausing

⛔Emotion affects all our interactions so take a moment to check in with yourself before attempting to influence others.

Ask yourself: “What state of mind am I in right now?” If it is an unhelpful one, then pause to let those feelings subside.

• If you're an over-thinker...

• If you're a procrastinator...

• If you're indecisive...

• If you can't choose from the options...

• If you can't optimize your decision...

💯You should learn how to make better decisions.

4. Compromising

👉First requests can significantly influence the success of later ones—so start with a high demand and then compromise.

5. Knowing

🗨️Demonstrating your expertise and knowledge before you start speaking will make sure that people listen.

Include qualifications and experience at the very top of your CV. Never hide them away at the end.

6. Asking

☑️Asking for help can be an effective way of building bridges with people. And, ultimately, persuading them to your side.

Remember that a short sting of possible embarrassment is a small price to pay compared to the lingering ache of “if only.”

7. Conversing

🗣️When it comes to successful influence, it’s good to talk.Practice “introducing yourself” in front of a mirror—remember eye contact and a genuine smile.

8. Liking

🫂To get someone to agree with you, get them to like you first. Do your preparation. Seek out similarities, such as shared backgrounds, interests, and experiences. Be sure to highlight them before making your pitch or request.

9. Labeling

🏷️Labeling involves assigning a trait, attitude, belief, or another label to a person before making a request of that person that’s consistent with that label.

10. Losing

❌Because losses weigh more heavily than gains, highlight to your listener what they stand to lose.Value your time so that others will too.

Don’t say “I’m free all day, you choose a time.” Instead say: “I can meet on Saturday, either at four or seven.”

Top 6 lesson learned from book - Wings Of Fire.

1)We are all born with a divine fire in us.

Our efforts should be to give wings to this fire.

Every person possesses extraordinary power within himself. Once we realize that power, we should not let that potential go to waste. We should take steps towards achieving our goals by knowing that we have the power and are capable of what we want to achieve. We should always keep that fire burning in our souls and let it guide us.

2)Total commitment is not just hard work; it is total involvement.

Commitment is not just working 24*7 or working with no direction or just completing the work before you anyhow. Commitment is the way of doing your task by putting your whole and soul into it. Total involvement is- your attention should be only on your job but nowhere else. Total involvement means doing the work with great excellence.

3)Problems are part of life; sufferings is the essence of success.

365 days of the year are not the same. Everyone has to face ups and downs in their life, particularly on the path of achieving their dreams. But these obstacles do not come in your way to stop you. They come to teach you some lessons and to make you stronger than before. Sufferings might seem unpleasant; still, we should welcome them as we welcome pleasure because we can not really enjoy success until we have experienced suffering. We should learn from them, and we should use them as an opportunity to increase our standard.

4)A big shot is nothing but a little shot that keeps on shooting.

Often we get overwhelmed by the notion of perfection or the notion of sudden big change in our life. But to accomplish the goal, we have to put it into work every single day. We can not get success overnight. It takes time, and our job is to do our defined work every day because success is a series of small wins.

5)Naturally, major opportunities are accompanied by equally major challenges.

The bigger you dream, the harder you have to work, the harder challenges you have to confront in your journey. And this will be a futile expectation that with average efforts, you can achieve something extraordinary. There is a simple law if you want to achieve some great heights in your life, you should be prepared to face that many great challenges.

6)Before God trusts you with success, you must prove yourself humble enough to handle the big prize.

Before god, reward your success. He always tests the person whether he deserves it or not. Therefore, always keep yourself grounded and be kind to others. Do not be egoist after getting a successor before that. Because God always favors those who are worth handling the success without being rude.

What kind of procrastinatorare you?Type of procrastination -

1)Hesitators

Hesitators have such a hard time

making decisions that they often get to

work rather late in the game, whether it’s

working on a paper or studying for an

exam. Hesitators tend to avoid new

situations because they're likely to cause

anxiety and feelings of incompetence.

Hesitators would gain a lot from trusting

themselves more. If they think they'll

have trouble with an assignment, they

can always ask for help from a colleague

or a teacher.

2)Shirkers

Shirkers try to avoid disagreeable or

boring situations. They prefer to keep their

minds distracted by busying themselves

with other work. They probably feel

anxious about being evaluated and prefer

to hand their work in at the last minute.

This way they can justify their poor

performance by saying they didn't have

enough time. It's important for shirkers to

increase their tolerance for activities that

they don’t particularly enjoy, and to realize

that their teachers are evaluating the quality

of their work, not their value as individual

people.

3) Perfectionist

Perfectionists are often chasing after such

inaccessibly high standards they end up

discouraged rather than motivated. Their

quest for excellence leaves them chronically

dissatisfied, which pushes them to

perpetually postpone handing in their work.

Luckily, by accepting their strengths and

weaknesses and following project or

homework guidelines, perfectionists can

decrease their anxiety and get the work

piling up on their desk done - on time!

A) Anarchists

Anarchists don't much like having to meet

other people's standards. They don't feel

very motivated when they see a task as

imposed on them, and they react by

postponing it so they can accomplish

something more satisfying. They're

sometimes very invested in extracurricular

activities, which excite them more and might

eat up all their time. (Opportunities are certainly not lacking on campus!) To improve their work habits, anarchists might find reasons to get started by linking their assignments with their personal interests.

Becoming aware of the excuses we use to

justify putting off our obligations enables

us to recognize those moments in which

we're in danger of succumbing to

procrastination. This is a crucial step if you're

going to respond effectively next time!

The next step is convincing yourself to

actually do your work, in order to ensure

your academic success and maintain your

quality of life.

10 ways to stop procrastination.

1)Resolve Any Potential Emergency

What is the worst-case scenario if I ignore this

issue?

2) Do a 5- to 10-Minute Daily Review

Make sure you're focusing on the right things.

3) Focus On Your MITS

These have the biggest long-term

impact on your life.

4)Eat the Frog

Complete the hardest task first, the one that you

know you're mostly likely to procrastinate on.

5) Mini Habit for Challenging Tasks

Set a "lowball" goal that makes it simple to get started on challenging tasks.

6)Elephant Habits for Ongoing Projects)

Chip away at daunting tasks in 5- to 10-minute

increments every day.

7)Build the Discomfort Habit

This will increase your personal tolerance for completing challenging tasks.

8) Build the Awareness Habit

What reason do I have for putting off this task? Why do I feel it's so tough to do?

9)Bundle Rewards with Actions

Only allow reward yourself when you do

something that benefits you in the long term.

10) Attach All Tasks to a Goal

Connect each personal and professional responsibility to an important value or goal.

Top 20 Lessons from book -Mastery by Robert Greene

1 – Understand who you truly are, and what kind of vocation or career you feel called to do.

2 – Commit to an apprenticeship, in which you undergo years of humble observation, skill acquisition, and experimentation.

3 – Revert to a feeling of inferiority, and possess and deep humility and eagerness to learn from others.

4 – Move toward resistance and pain, let go of need for comfort/security, and cross the threshold past the initial tedious stages of learning.

5 – After apprenticeship phase, you must become bold, confident, and willing to test out skills and make connections between different ideas.

6 – Learn to embrace criticism and failure, and be grateful for the opportunity to learn and improve as a result of your mistakes.

7 – Understand that there is an emotional component, not intellectual, that separates the true masters from others.

8 – Develop your social intelligence, and your ability to empathetically put yourself in another person’s shoes and see/understand things from his or her perspective.

9 – Move past the habitual tendency to judge others or idealize/demonize them, and simply observe them rather than projecting your own thoughts, emotions, or insecurities onto them.

10 – You must be wary of many peoples’ tendencies to display certain vices that could hinder your progress, such as: envy, conformism, rigidity, self-obsessiveness, laziness, flightiness, and passive aggression.

11 – Learn to speak through your work, and to win others to your side of thinking by being patient and letting what you have done speak for itself.

12 – Try to see yourself as other see you, so that you can remain emotionally detached and try to improve upon your flaws and shortcomings.

13 – Suffer fools gladly, and don’t take criticism seriously or personally from people who don’t know what they’re talking about.

14 – Return to your childlike sense of wonder and endless curiosity about all things in order to stimulate your creative energy.

15 – Drop all preconceived notions about he world, and utilize the power of your imagination to the fullest.

16 – Always be open and receptive to new ideas that challenge conventionality, and don’t be afraid of thinking something that is unpopular.

17 – Love learning for its own sake, and connect a wide array of ideas from different fields of study and disciplines.

18 – Maintain a sense of destiny/purpose and feel consciously connected to it.

19 – Qualities that will help you succeed: Self-discipline, desire, persistence, focus, effort, patience, energy, obsessiveness, observance, confidence, trust in self, emotional commitment, humility, adaptability, boldness, openness.

20 – Qualities that hinder your success: Complacency, conservatism, dependency, impatience, grandiosity, inflexibility, distractibility, becoming egotistical, close-mindedness.

10 Top Lessons From the Book “ No Excuses”

1. Set a deadline for your goal.

🎯What do you do if you don’t achieve your goal by your deadline?

Simple. You set another deadline.

2. Write your goal

💥Then discipline yourself to generate twenty answers to the question: “How can I achieve this goal?”.

3. The fact is that “if you’re not getting better, you’re getting worse”.

4. Look ahead three to five years

✅Determine the new knowledge and skills you will need in order to lead your field in the future.

🤛Then start acquiring them today.

5. Select the top person in your field

🥇The one you admire most, and use him or her as a role model for our own development.

6. Failures feel sorry for themselves when things go wrong,

❌whereas successful people look for the valuable lesson they can learn that will help them in the future.

7. In life, it doesn’t matter how many times you get knocked down.

All that matters is how many times you get back up.

🟢If you continue to get back up and press onward, you must eventually reach your goal.

8. Simple three-part formula for success at work:

💥come in little earlier, work a little harder, and stay a little later.

9. Only your actions tell you- and others- what you truly value.

10. If you increase your exercise level to 60 minutes each time, five time per week, you will be in the top 1 or 2 % of physically fit people in the world today.

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Top 10 lesson from book- GRIT

1. Grit > Talent

Grit Talent Agency

The first lesson I learned in the book is that grit matters more than talent. Many people believe that talent is what leads to success, but that is not true and it underestimates the value of hard work and effort.

In fact, Angela Duckworth mentioned that effort counts twice in achieving our goals, while talent only counts once.

Talent x Effort = Skill

Skill x Effort = Achievment

Sure, talent may account for a small part of your success, but the effort you put into achieving your goals is the main factor.

One could have a great talent at doing a specific task/action, but without putting effort into it, that talent is of no use.

The more you rely on effort and hard work, the more your skills will improve.

2. Doing hard tasks will help you improve

Nowadays, life has become easy. We can just click a button and have food delivered to our homes. We can just pay some money and have someone mow our lawn for us.

While this type of lifestyle is relaxing and puts less stress on us, it also makes us used to not having to do hard work. It makes us less comfortable with having to put extra time and effort into getting something done.

That’s why it is important to do hard things and keep pushing ourselves out of our comfort zone. Doing this will help us be more disciplined to achieve our goals and be able to become the person in life we aspire to be.

Everyone has to do a hard thing (something that requires deliberate practice)

You can quit, but not at any time

You get to pick your hard thing

Try following this rule as well and see how well it works for you!

Remember, you have to keep pushing yourself to become the best version of yourself.

3. Embrace a growth mindset

Embrace a growth mindset

A growth mindset is extremely important for not only building grit, but also for achieving success.

According to Angela Duckworth, a growth mindset leads to optimistic self-talk, which then leads to perseverance over adversity. It helps you seek out new challenges “that will ultimately make you even stronger.”

With a growth mindset, you know you can and are willing to improve yourself to become the best version of yourself.

So, if you want to adopt a growth mindset, start believing in yourself and also start viewing your challenges as opportunities!

4. Surround yourself with gritty people

One way to increase your grit level and become more gritty is to surround yourself with gritty people and join a gritty culture.

In my other blogs, I mention surrounding yourself with people you want to be like and this relates perfectly.

Doing this will help you be inspired and motivated to act like them.

The culture you live in shapes several aspects of yourself, so if you want it to positively affect you, make sure that your culture is full of people you want to be like, not the opposite.

One example is joining a swim team, which requires you to wake up early and swim multiple laps. One probably wouldn’t do that all by him/herself, but with other people doing the same, it provides motivation.

5. Discover your interests

Discover your interests

As teenagers, we may not know exactly what we’re interested in and what we want to do in the future. And, that is totally okay. In fact, Angela Duckworth totally understands this and gives advice as to how we can discover our interests. She recommends asking ourselves these questions:

What do I like to think about?

Where does my mind wander?

What do I really care about?

What matters most to me?

How do I enjoy spending my time?

What do I find absolutel unbearable?

To discover your interests, keep exploring and experiment with new things and see what piques your fascination!

6. Know your purpose

Know your purpose

A lot of view our purpose in life as something that benefits only ourselves, not others. In fact, I used to think that until I read Angela Duckworth’s point of view on purpose.

She defines purpose as “the intention to contribute to the well-being of others.”

Your purpose is the deeper meaning behind your goals and aims. Once you find meaning in your work, you will be more driven to accomplish all your goals.

This book taught me that purpose is knowing that what I do matters to more than just myself.

To find your purpose, ask yourself, “How can I contribute to the well-being of others?”

7. Learn how to fail

Learn how to fail

A lot of people believe that failures are a sign of weakness, something negative. That’s what I used to think, too. However, I learned that failing is part of the journey of success.

There’s no way we can prevent failure in life – it’s going to happen at one point or another.

Failures are what train us for success. By failing, we learn about the mistakes we made and make sure to not repeat them again. So, in a way, there are like stepping stones to success.

Instead of regretting our failures, we should accept them, learn from them, and move on with our lives.

8. Routines are important

Routines are important

I didn’t expect Angela Duckworth to describe routines in her book about grit, but I thought wrong. She mentions how routines are important to boost productivity Because sometimes we may feel like procrastinating and not want to work on something, having routines makes it easier to get started. When you have a designated place in your home solely for working and you work at the same time, you will be able to get started without even thinking about it.

Grit involves putting in a lot of effort and hard work, and routines play a big part in helping us get started with all that work and not procrastinate.

So, if you want to increase your grit, be sure to implement a consistent routine into your daily life!

9. Be positive

Be positive

Being positive is not only great for feeling happy more often, but also for cultivating grit.

Being positive improves your performance for the future and helps you accomplish your goals without worrying about the setback.

By being optimistic, you are willing to learn from your mistakes, grow from your failures, and continue working towards being your best self.

With an optimistic attitude, nothing can hold you back, no matter how many challenges or setbacks you face.

Having optimism is definitely going to increase your grit, so try looking on the bright side more often!

10. Aim to improve yourself every day

Aim to improve yourself every day

Last but not least, I learned that it is important to have a goal to improve yourself every day.

People with grit always want to improve, no matter how good they are already.

Whatever their goal or purpose is, they aspire to get better at it each and every day.

Every day, there are opportunities to better ourselves and grow ourselves – we just have to be on the lookout for them.

It’s you against you, not you against anyone else.

Top 10 lesson learned from book-Mindset: The New Psychology of Success

1. Adopt a Growth Mindset and Focus on Learning Over Achievement.

When you focus on a growth mindset, you embrace all the things that have felt threatening: challenge, struggle, criticism, and setbacks.

When you embrace the tough stuff, you open yourself up to fully realize your potential and all that you can be. Instead of depending on luck or “natural” talent, you focus on developing your skills and abilities, and learning from your efforts.

2. You Can Change Your Mindset.

The good news is that even if you currently have a fixed mindset, it’s not a fixed thing.

“Mindsets are an important part of your personality, but you can change them. Just by knowing about the two mindsets, you can start thinking and reacting in new ways. People tell me that they start to catch themselves when they are in the throes of the fixed mindset — passing up a chance for learning, feeling labeled by a failure, or getting discouraged when something requires a lot of effort. And then they switch themselves into the growth mindset — making sure they take the challenge, learn from the failure, or continue their effort. “

3. You Can Put Yourself into a Growth Mindset

You can try a growth mindset on for size, even if it’s just temporary. You can even do it on the spot.

“It’s also important to realize that even if people have a fixed mindset, they’re not always in that mindset. In fact, in many of our studies, we put people into a growth mindset. We tell them that an ability can be learned and that the task will give them a chance to do that. Or we have them read a scientific article that teaches them the growth mindset. The article describes people who did not have natural ability, but who developed exceptional skills. These experiences make our research participants into growth-minded thinkers, at least for the moment — and they act like growth-minded thinkers, too.”

4. The Growth Mindset Allows You to Love What You’re Doing

With a fixed mindset, you love the score. With the growth mindset, you love the process and the growth.

“The growth mindset does allow people to love what they’re doing — and to continue to love it in the face of difficulties. The growth-minded athletes, CEOs, musicians, or scientists all loved what they did, whereas many of the fixed-minded ones did not.

Many growth-minded people didn’t even plan to go to the top. They got there as a result of doing what they love. It’s ironic: The top is where the fixed-mindset people hunger to be, but it’s where many growth-minded people arrive as a by-product of their enthusiasm for what they do.”

5. The Growth Mindset Makes It Worth It, Regardless of the Outcome

With the fixed inset, unless you win, you lose. But with the growth mindset, the journey is the reward, even when things don’t go as planned.

“In the fixed mindset, everything is about the outcome. If you fail — or if you’re not the best — it’s all been wasted. The growth mindset allows people to value what they’re doing regardless of the outcome. They’re tackling problems, charting new courses, working on important issues. Maybe they haven’t found the cure for cancer, but the search was deeply meaningful.”

6. See Your Relationships from a Growth Mindset.

Your relationships change when you let go of your ideal images and think of them from a growth standpoint.

“Picture your ideal love relationship. Does it involve perfect compatibility — no disagreements, no compromises, no hard work? Please think again. In every relationship, issues arise. Try to see them from a growth mindset: Problems can be a vehicle for developing greater understanding and intimacy. Allow your partner to air his or her differences, listen carefully and discuss them in a patient and caring manner. You may be surprised at the closeness this creates.”

7. Artistic Ability Can Be Developed Far Greater than What You’re Born With

Just because some people seem naturally good at something, doesn’t mean that others can’t do it, and sometimes even better with training.

“Edwards agrees that most people view drawing as a magical ability that only a select few possess, and that only a select few will ever possess. But this is because people don’t understand the components — the learnable components — of drawing. Actually, she informs us, they are not drawing skills at all, but seeing skills. They are the ability to perceive edges, spaces, relationships, lights and shadows, and the whole. Drawing requires us to learn each component skill and then combine them into one process. Some people simply puck up these skills in the natural course of their lives, whereas others have to work to learn them and put them together.”

8. Physical Skills Can Be Developed Far Greater than What You’re Born With.

Do you think the fastest woman on earth was born that way?

Nope.

Wilma Rudolph, hailed as the fastest woman on earth after she won three gold medals for sprints and relay in the 1960 Rome Olympics, didn’t start out so “lucky.”

She was far from a physical wonder as a youngster. She was a premature baby, the twentieth of twenty-two children born to her parents, and a constantly sick child. At four years of age, she nearly died of a long struggle with double pneumonia, scarlet fever, and polio, emerging with a mostly paralyzed left leg. Doctors gave her little hope of using it again. For eight years, she vigorously pursued physical therapy until at age twelve she shed her leg brace and began to walk normally.”

9. Parents, Teachers, and Coaches: Don’t Judge, Teach.

Parents, teachers, and coaches shape mindsets through their actions and words.

“In fact, every word and action can send a message. It tells children — or students, or athletes — how to think about themselves. It can be a fixed-mindset message that says: You have permanent traits and I’m judging them. Or it can be a growth-mindset message that says: You are a developing person and I am interested in your development.

Praising children’s intelligence harms their motivation and it harms their performance. Parents think they can hand children permanent confidence — like a gift — by praising their brains and talent. It doesn’t work, and in fact has the opposite effect. It makes children doubt themselves as soon as anything is hard or anything goes wrong. If parents want to give their children a gift, the best thing they can do is to teach their children to love challenges, be intrigued by mistakes, enjoy effort, and keep on learning. That way, their children don’t have to be slaves of praise. They will have a lifelong way to build and repair their own confidence.”

10. We All Have Interests that Can Blossom into Abilities.

Don’t let a fixed mindset hold you back from what you’re capable of.

“The same is true for every prodigy Winner describes. Most often people believe that the ‘gift’ is the ability itself. Yet what feeds it is that constant, endless curiosity and challenge seeking.

Is it ability or mindset? Was it Mozart’s musical ability or the fact that he worked till his hands were deformed? Was it Darwin’s scientific ability or the fact that he collected specimens nonstop from early childhood?”

Break the chains.

Let go.

Enjoy the process of becoming what you’re capable of.

In the words of Steve Maraboli:

“Once your mindset changes, everything on the outside will change along with it.”